Deep in the heart of the earth, in a dreary concrete bunker, I sit on a metal stool and prepare to be interrogated. There are questions I do not want to answer, but the results of this debriefing will determine my future–my survival.
What did you accomplish this month?
What do you mean “a lot”? You missed several deadlines and still haven’t shown any results.
I am still alive, what better results could I have?
Don’t hedge, we trim hedges around here. Tell us why you don’t have anything to show.
Ah, but I do. *tosses flash drive in the air*
That old draft? You should have left it in November.
OLD?!! It’s brand new! Sir, I’ve brought this thing to 75,000 words and am almost done editing. I didn’t make it to the drop point to get the file to my contact, but boy, I’ve gone through an estimated 2,000 comments!
I attended a top secret writer’s club as well as spent some writing time all alone at a wonderful Christian coffee shop. But, you know that. I smiled at your hidden cameras.
With work like that and the extreme help of my beta readers, I completed the mission.
Completed? You’re not done yet.
We’re almost there though. I have several agents updating the file, and the manuscript is scheduled for formatting mid week. My cover designer is finalizing the cover as we speak. And I added “Crossroads” to Goodreads!
My questioner taps his desk. I can not tell if he is moved by my efforts. He thumbs through some papers and continues.
What did you learn this month? What intel did you gather?
Google mapped the Galapagos islands, trying to find some details for a friend.
I tried to find out how to break glass quietly–but unfortunately, my story character didn’t have the required tools.
Dove into my genealogy a bit–fascinating! I’m actually descended from humans!
Chest injuries. I’m counting broken ribs in my story… but ya know, getting crunched is part of the job description.
I’ve also been attending a class about business startups. The most recent class regarded the MVP, iterations of the MVP, and pivoting. Good stuff.
Towards, backwards, forwards and so on, are all British spellings. Backward Americans have moved toward just saying “forward”.
Most importantly I researched how long it takes to pass out in a chokehold… it really depends.
This face means I’m unimpressed. What did you waste time on?
What? I didn’t waste… it was all well spent!!
Then why so little productivity?
My job isn’t all about publishing–there are other important things like getting sick, spending Sundays at church, social events, water wars, nephews, building websites, oh and some life too. Life is made of dishes, school, laundry, cooking (really good food), and yard work.
Aaaaaaand… maybe I did waste a tiny bit of time. XD
My questioner folds my file and puts it in his briefcase. Before I know it, I am blindfolded and being led out of the bunker.